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Storytelling

I’m Freezing to Death!

Like every storyteller every, I am regularly accused of exaggerating.

And I say,

“Yes, I exaggerate. A thousand times yes!”

The fact is we learn how to exaggerate from our mothers.

“I’ve told you a million times, not to do that!”

Storytelling

Go ahead, make my day!

“Do you wanna punk? Do you really want to” and then with the target steadfastly mute, non responsive, I went full Defcon 1 on it’s sorry ass.

“Go ahead, make my day!”

And I filled it with burning lead.

“Perhaps we should call it a day.”

ageing

Remember This

“Let me tell you about a murder trial I did in Whitehorse a few years back”

You show me the dinner guest that can resist that invitation.

I began,

“There she was naked on the bed. Dead.”

And with that my wife stood up at the head of the table and said …

humour

‘when’

“She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say “when”. ”
PG Wodehouse

Storytelling

“Phoenix Rising”

So a nod to the mythological bird or you live in Arizone?” They both laughed.

“We have named all of our boats ‘Phoenix RIsing’. It symbolizes new beginnings, a fresh start.” Miriam said. She gave a quick glance at Bob. as she spoke. We all have stories, We all have fascinating stories, and these two I have no doubt are no exception.

Storytelling

My Resting Bitch Face

Turns out a Resting Bitch Face is a real thing. Seems the facial muscles that held up my beautiful face through my 75 years have lost some of their elasticity, their tone. Yeah sure, I’ll add that to my freakin’ list! Add in a touch of gravity, eh voilà, my Resting Bitch Face.

Storytelling

Monkey Business

This blog may cause your face to scrunch up in a less than attractive way and sounds reflecting just how revolting the whole thing is, may escape from your mouths. But bear with me, this is actually not about my ear wax, it is about Jane Goodall.

Storytelling

Let’s eat, Bumpy

Well to you naysayers I offer you proof, although harm may come to you, if you choose to take up this challenge. Write a card or a letter to your wife or girlfriend, or partner, as you choose. In that card inscribe the following …

About Me

Writing for profit is a fool’s game. I don’t, I write for myself. Some of my writing is profound, some is important, but most of it is neither of those two things. I am at my best as an observational humourist, filtering the mundane through the ‘amusing’ lens and writing. 

David Sedaris is a great American observational humourist and he has unknowingly guided me as I spelunked my way through many a dark, confusing writing tunnel. He taught me to stop worrying about inspiration. He says that human beings are very funny, hilarious at times. The knack he says is to get better at seeing it. He is right, if I have grown as a writer it is because I am better now at ‘seeing’ us as we are, simple and complex, shallow and profound, tragic and hilarious. We are endlessly fascinating, a never ending source of writing inspiration.

My books are for sale, my blog is free for you to enjoy. You can read them or listen to them, as you prefer. Generally, I add one new blog weekly and you can subscribe to receive notice. The subscription is free and I do nothing with your information. You will be joining other readers from over seventy-five countries around the world.

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